This post is about a comparison that should have struck me months ago. As someone with two unique blogs, one on losing faith in a Christian university and one on eating and living a completely different lifestyle from generally recognized health practices, one would assume this was the theme of my first post. What can I say, we'll chalk it up to brain fog.
What I mean, of course, is that health and faith quickly become two sides of the same coin. Your family's beliefs become your beliefs; simple explanations are swiftly popularized; sages of knowledge are assumed to possess understanding that mere mortals are happiest simply accepting; but most importantly, the devoted crave the company of the devotees and often either pity or resent all other paths.
(To the readers I'm quickly offending and scarring for life, these are generalizations, and gross ones at that. There are certainly excellent, praise-worthy, respectable minds and hearts in these camps. I would argue that they are the minority, but I certainly acknowledge them. And continue to compare the shortcomings of the majority.)
To the same degree that government once was, and still is for some, inextricably linked with spiritual authority, health has also enjoyed a special relationship with our belief systems. We both pray for healing and discuss our spiritual health; witch doctors and monks alike will call on one side to benefit the other. But what's especially fascinating is the experience of those who, for whatever reason, decide to assume some level of maturity and autonomy over either condition: who decide they have the capability of interpreting human history and nature for themselves instead of having it interpreted for them. Suddenly, the gods—the carbs, the prophets, the convenience foods, the fairytales, the chronic cardio, the judgmental superiority complex—begin to crumble before rationality. Of course, this is not to say the gods are always less inviting; but it tends to becomes an exercise in futility to embrace a theistic worldview when it just no longer holds up to logic.
To choose a different path from conventional health/faith is arguably one of the most difficult decisions an individual can make. It is easier in every dimension—mental, physical, social, emotional—to bumble along with the currents and flows of all the voices around you. In either case, their concern can be absolutely suffocating, whether your new course is currently bringing you brilliant success or utter misery.
I once read (and I wish I knew where, so I could link it) a man's comment that he would rather discuss religion, politics, and sex simultaneously at the dinner table than touch the "health" subject even for a minute. To accept a different wisdom from the faith in Creationism or low-fat shakes is to rock the boat almost unbearably. Eventually, we strike out on our own, and find what consolation the Internet can offer. Fortunately, this has turned out to be more than I might have thought.
To conclude, a little song I hummed while walking this afternoon:
I have decided to become primal
I have decided to become primal
I have decided to become primal
No turning back, no turning back
Though none go with me, still I will Grok on
Though none go with me, still I will Grok on
Though none go with me, still I will Grok on
No turning back, no turning back
Low-fat behind me, bacon before me
Low-fat behind me, bacon before me
Low-fat behind me, bacon before me
No turning back, no turning back
Will you decide now, to eat that whipped cream?
Will you decide now, to eat that whipped cream?
Will you decide now, to eat that whipped cream?
No turning back, no turning back
Thursday, February 7, 2013
The Zoo
Confession: I've never found the idea of animals in zoos all that horribly offensive.
Possibility: Maybe this is because modern society puts I/us into a faux habitat, chained by ultra-convenience and sub-par diets and then duly entertained. Perhaps the zoo monkey and I are equally capable of escape but, having never tasted freedom, equally incapable of caring.
Possibility B: Maybe the monkey gets out and realizes, y'know...it's kinda lonely out here on my own in the wild...
Possibility: Maybe this is because modern society puts I/us into a faux habitat, chained by ultra-convenience and sub-par diets and then duly entertained. Perhaps the zoo monkey and I are equally capable of escape but, having never tasted freedom, equally incapable of caring.
Possibility B: Maybe the monkey gets out and realizes, y'know...it's kinda lonely out here on my own in the wild...
Friday, February 1, 2013
Two Little Breath Mints
So I went to a job fair today, then got back and worked a couple hours. While the time was well-spent (one interview and one strong interest, huzzah!), I'm drop-dead tired at the end—and not quite sure how to interpret this.
Perhaps it was the two little breath mints I took off one of the job tables because, hey, when else would you ever need a breath mint more than at a job fair? The extra-thick coating on my tongue really wasn't worth it, though. And if the limp, crashed form of me currently couch potatoing in front of the TV was a direct result of clean breath, I'll take the garlic version next time.
On the bright side, my doctor signed off on my six-month plan today! Double huzzah! On the downside, résumé paper and business cards are expensive. Not to mention gas and registration fees. So I may have to stretch my food with the dining hall this coming week. :( This should be interesting…
Perhaps it was the two little breath mints I took off one of the job tables because, hey, when else would you ever need a breath mint more than at a job fair? The extra-thick coating on my tongue really wasn't worth it, though. And if the limp, crashed form of me currently couch potatoing in front of the TV was a direct result of clean breath, I'll take the garlic version next time.
On the bright side, my doctor signed off on my six-month plan today! Double huzzah! On the downside, résumé paper and business cards are expensive. Not to mention gas and registration fees. So I may have to stretch my food with the dining hall this coming week. :( This should be interesting…
Tuesday, January 29, 2013
Grease
So the further I am in GAPS the more frustrated I and my roommates (they more than me) get with greasy dishes. It becomes an environmental catch-22, where any fat in the sewage system is supposedly sinful; but using strong detergents to break down the fats is damaging to my skin, body, and eventually the environment as well. Wiping dishes down with a rag doesn't improve the sewage situation and wiping them down with paper towels still uses paper/fills landfills. Frozen cans of fat in the freezer are recommended, but the problem is greasy films, not large amounts of fat (which I would eat).
Help! Is there a lesser of evils here, or some magical, better way?
Help! Is there a lesser of evils here, or some magical, better way?
Sacrifices
I posted previously on my two stumbling blocks: my job, and eating in the dining hall (aka my social life). A little over a week ago, I finally started to get a little bit of a handle on dealing with these issues, and I wanted to share the key that seems to have made some difference for me: the concept of sacrifice.
I think it's fair to say that a sacrifice cannot occur without being the direct descendent of commitment. If something is given without any form of commitment, it ceases to be a sacrifice. "Love", outside of "emotional attachment", is often defined through this pair of concepts; when we ask of ourselves how committed we are to a loved one, we generally end up asking, 'How much have I sacrificed?'
Fortunately, I've found I can use this pairing to my advantage. Instead of making a commitment and expecting the sacrifice to follow, which inevitably fails, it has ended up that when I make sacrifices for the GAPS diet and for my health in general, commitment inevitably follows.
For example, knowing that my job is one of my two key stumbling blocks, I decided to make a sacrifice and change offices for a shift. (I'm lucky to have this option available.) This was a sacrifice not just of my opportunities to snitch all the goodies I shouldn't, but also of chit-chat time with co-workers as I was in a more isolated location. In the process of giving this up, commitment to a cleaner diet started becoming easier. One slip makes others feel natural; one sacrifice makes others feel natural, too.
I'm still working through the social sacrifice. I've got to admit, this one's getting harder as time goes on instead of easier. I miss my friends. A lot. At the same time, the deeper it cuts to feel excluded, the more power I have to acknowledge that I am choosing this sacrifice, that it is valuable, and that other sacrifices can and must follow.
I think it's fair to say that a sacrifice cannot occur without being the direct descendent of commitment. If something is given without any form of commitment, it ceases to be a sacrifice. "Love", outside of "emotional attachment", is often defined through this pair of concepts; when we ask of ourselves how committed we are to a loved one, we generally end up asking, 'How much have I sacrificed?'
Fortunately, I've found I can use this pairing to my advantage. Instead of making a commitment and expecting the sacrifice to follow, which inevitably fails, it has ended up that when I make sacrifices for the GAPS diet and for my health in general, commitment inevitably follows.
For example, knowing that my job is one of my two key stumbling blocks, I decided to make a sacrifice and change offices for a shift. (I'm lucky to have this option available.) This was a sacrifice not just of my opportunities to snitch all the goodies I shouldn't, but also of chit-chat time with co-workers as I was in a more isolated location. In the process of giving this up, commitment to a cleaner diet started becoming easier. One slip makes others feel natural; one sacrifice makes others feel natural, too.
I'm still working through the social sacrifice. I've got to admit, this one's getting harder as time goes on instead of easier. I miss my friends. A lot. At the same time, the deeper it cuts to feel excluded, the more power I have to acknowledge that I am choosing this sacrifice, that it is valuable, and that other sacrifices can and must follow.
Yogrrrrrt
I. Hate. Yogurt.
Lie. I love yogurt, it's pretty much the highlight of the diet for me. (That, and honey, and both together—yay honey!!!) But somehow I landed in an apartment that is absolutely determined to sabotage all my attempts at yogurt making. Sad face.
I would like to point out: college student. This stuff ain't cheap. 24q4renkjl;dfj. So I'm currently eating attempts 7 and 9, despite their being too thin and cooked/dead (respectively). This probably means I'm getting all kinds of milk sugar I shouldn't be, but c'est la vie—I don't have the money and my roommates are tired of the oven being occupied/apartment being stuffy 24 hours at a time.
Lie. I love yogurt, it's pretty much the highlight of the diet for me. (That, and honey, and both together—yay honey!!!) But somehow I landed in an apartment that is absolutely determined to sabotage all my attempts at yogurt making. Sad face.
- Attempt 1: Yogurt in a crock pot on warm. Fail. Too hot.
- Attempt 2: Add more starter to crock pot (off), then leave with desk lamp. Fail. Too cold.
- Attempt 3: Add a bit more starter, bundle in a sleeping bag and place on top of frig with desk lamp. Fail. Too cold.
- Attempt 4: Place in oven on warm. Began as a fail (too hot), but with door propped just right and more starter, I had my first success.
- Attempt 5: Place in oven again…roommate's bf spills it everywhere.
- Attempt 6: Grocery denies my card at midnight…turns out my bank is down. Fail. No starter.
- Attempt 7: Place in oven. Fail. I don't even know why the **** why, but could be because I went back to the grocery and…someone got there ten minutes before and grabbed every container of the only plain/organic/live culture my grocery sells. I tried vanilla.
- Attempt 8: Place in oven. Fail. I get to cry over spilling the milk(/starter) this time.
 |
| Yogurt, half spilled. |
- Attempt 9: Place in oven, add more starter and milk to above. Fail. Too hot.
I would like to point out: college student. This stuff ain't cheap. 24q4renkjl;dfj. So I'm currently eating attempts 7 and 9, despite their being too thin and cooked/dead (respectively). This probably means I'm getting all kinds of milk sugar I shouldn't be, but c'est la vie—I don't have the money and my roommates are tired of the oven being occupied/apartment being stuffy 24 hours at a time.
Frickin yogurt.
Update!
Hello there blogosphere! I'm back! It's been a couple weeks, so here's what's happened in my GAPS journey thus far.
I went along pretty well for a week after my last post. The main exception was a chili cook-off; how can one make chili without sampling said chili? And that led to a downhill slope of sampling all chilis, and then having a full bowl of a couple chilis. Interestingly, the effects weren't as drastic as I was expecting. I blamed it on my body needing a "carb reload" and continued on my way. At the end of the week I visited my boyfriend's house; here I fell into another slump. I even brought my own food, but what's that compared to grandma cookies?
Which brings us to the beginning of last week. I'd had it. I was tired of the off-again on-again thing, and I finally pinpointed the root of many of my slips out of GAPS (and subsequent plunges). In addition to learning some lessons about eliminating this root, which I'll discuss more in a post about sacrifice, I started keeping a count of perfect days on my mirror in eyeliner:
Today is day 8! Woohoo! Why 50 total? Haven't the slightest idea, it sounded like a nice achievable number. Since this calendar, I've only had one bad day. (Ok, two; but I excused one due to helping a friend, skipping lunch, and ending up incredibly hungry.)
Much more importantly: as my tally counted up and I began to feel more in control of the GAPS style, my mother and I reached an important conclusion. I've decided to go off my meds and supplements for six months—minus thyroid hormone and hydrocortisone, which are subject to scrutiny. Why?
Because I've decided that over the next six months, I want to discover what it means for me, personally, to achieve my optimum health without intervention. (At the end, we'll reassess the intervention options.) This means working through GAPS. This means low stress and lots of sleep. This means some structured exercise, a whole lot of walking, and active play time.
In college. Yep. I'm crazy like that.
As for what my daily GAPS diet looks like, it's something like this:
I went along pretty well for a week after my last post. The main exception was a chili cook-off; how can one make chili without sampling said chili? And that led to a downhill slope of sampling all chilis, and then having a full bowl of a couple chilis. Interestingly, the effects weren't as drastic as I was expecting. I blamed it on my body needing a "carb reload" and continued on my way. At the end of the week I visited my boyfriend's house; here I fell into another slump. I even brought my own food, but what's that compared to grandma cookies?
Which brings us to the beginning of last week. I'd had it. I was tired of the off-again on-again thing, and I finally pinpointed the root of many of my slips out of GAPS (and subsequent plunges). In addition to learning some lessons about eliminating this root, which I'll discuss more in a post about sacrifice, I started keeping a count of perfect days on my mirror in eyeliner:
Today is day 8! Woohoo! Why 50 total? Haven't the slightest idea, it sounded like a nice achievable number. Since this calendar, I've only had one bad day. (Ok, two; but I excused one due to helping a friend, skipping lunch, and ending up incredibly hungry.)
Much more importantly: as my tally counted up and I began to feel more in control of the GAPS style, my mother and I reached an important conclusion. I've decided to go off my meds and supplements for six months—minus thyroid hormone and hydrocortisone, which are subject to scrutiny. Why?
Because I've decided that over the next six months, I want to discover what it means for me, personally, to achieve my optimum health without intervention. (At the end, we'll reassess the intervention options.) This means working through GAPS. This means low stress and lots of sleep. This means some structured exercise, a whole lot of walking, and active play time.
In college. Yep. I'm crazy like that.
As for what my daily GAPS diet looks like, it's something like this:
- All meals: soup w/egg yolk and kraut, seasoned with turmeric, cayenne, and fresh basil
- Some ginger/honey concentrate
- One meal: seaweed (nori) in the soup
- Most meals: chocolate yogurt (yogurt, coconut oil, vanilla, and cocoa powder)
- Snacks: broth, almonds, cooked veggies
This puts me somewhere between stages 2 and 3 of intro. Turmeric is just an awesome spice all around, and cayenne is listed as a candida-fighter (which, after all, is a cousin of GAPS). I know Dr. Campbell-McBride doesn't recommend nori until Full GAPS, but I put it in for the iodine to support thyroid since I'm diagnosed hypothyroid. From what I can tell, cocoa is also normally Full GAPS; you could call it my treat to keep myself sane.
The plan is to keep to this til the end of the week and then, hopefully, bring on full stage 3. Where I'm really lacking in insight, and wish I could have some professional advice, is with candida. I've had mild but chronic thrush in my mouth for years, and one of my goals is to get my tongue to a nice healthy pink. What I'm unsure of is which stage of Intro to stop on while I wait for this to happen. Ideally, I'd rather not go full stage 3 til my tongue is healthy; but I don't really see this happening by the end of the week. On the other hand…this stage is getting old…! I shall post again when I have a better feel for the best decision.
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